devastated

Did I say I would be devastated if her line culture was positive? Well, I am. Her line was positive for a different bacteria (gram + rods) and yeast. We are repeating the culture, but will certainly loose the line. Will update more later. Abby still looks good, so thank God for that. I am...I don't even know. I feel like devastated is too strong of a word. It should be reserved for tornado victims, but it's the only word I can come up with for what I feel. It's devastating to go through this again.