Day 8... I think?

Another long, hard day. I keep wondering how much of this any of us can take, but I am afraid of the answer. Hospice keeps telling me that she can't keep going like this, then she somehow does.

Again, today we gathered to say goodbye. She was so blue, her hands and feet were cold, and she was unresponsive. Her O2 sats were stayed in the 50s all day when they didn't drop in the 40s. Her breathing has changed more times than I can count and yet she's here sleeping beside me.

She is still blue, running a 104 fever, and breathing a little more regularly than earlier in the day. She hasn't responded much at all today, and she gets worse by the minute, but strong Abby hangs on. It is emotionally exhausting to go through this every day, and yet I'm so grateful for the time we have with her. It's all so complicated.

Last night Emily wanted to see Abby. It was precious, and yes, I cried the whole time. Emily was so happy to see her. She threw her arm around her and gave her hand little licky kisses. It was so sweet to see Emily loving on and comforting her twin. Abby didn't respond, but I could tell it meant so much to Emily. It meant so much to me too.








Sarah spent time rubbing Abby's head and loving on her. She built her a Lego box, and crammed all of Abby's favorite Legos in it. Again, so sweet.

Jeff, me, Maw Maw, and grandpa all were able to spend time with her today too. I try not speak for other people on this blog, but I'm sure we all appreciated having this precious time with Abby, as challenging as it has been.

Just keep praying for us all please. It's the hardest thing in the world. Pray that Abby wouldn't be afraid, that her fever would come down, and she would pass peacefully.